Poem a Day December #10

This one also pairs nicely with yesterday’s “Sonnet” video, in that it, like Billy’s sonnet, uses the words on the page to count down toward some writing goal—not the building of a sonnet in this case, but rather, the simple goal of writing a thousand words a day, which must have been suggested to me at some point by someone with some writing gravitas...perhaps even Billy himself. Although he doesn’t strike me as a quota guy, so scratch that...could have been Anne Lamott, or Stephen King, or Spalding Gray or just about anybody else I was exposed to in my early writing years.

At any rate, here are...

285 Words Toward a Nitwit’s Quota

That’s 650 words in 32 minutes.

Together with the 260 words

before softball and the 1,190 words

taken from Dare to Win,

which I transcribed before the 260

aforementioned words,

makes 2,100 words on February 18, 2010.

Now, 1,000 words on February 19, 2010

and another 1,000 words

on February 20, 2010

and we will be off and running.

The saints, and the angels

and the dead kin

in heaven will all have

something to talk about—

the dimwitted Neanderthal who has,

to this point, been in the top 10%

of all humanity for drunkenness

and lack of productivity,

has finally begun putting words to paper.

Perhaps the nitwit will produce

something after all. Unlikely to be sure,

but possible.

And maybe my relatives

would like to pitch in,

create a focus group, say,

which will meet on a weekly basis

up there to spitball ideas

on how exactly they can

aid in the cause.

Maybe, an uncle will say,

I could send some random ideas

down at 3am each day for a week.

And I could cook his sleeping

brain some meatloaf and lima beans,

a great grandmother offers

so he’ll have the energy needed

to lift his head off the pillow

and transcribe.

It’s not much, adds my uncle.

Something, anyway, to help old

Dimwitted Nitwit do something

with his remaining hours

so he doesn’t show up here in heaven

asking for something

that he does not deserve.

By the way, that’s 240 words toward

February 19’s quota.

And now, if we add them all together,

including the ones to come, we will have

273 at the end of this sentence.


(Oops, that’s 274 plus these words for a total of 285.)

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