Happy July 4th! Here’s another one on the house from Dispatches from the Swinging Door Saloon.
If I Were Mayor
If I were mayor, I would draft an ordinance
making you my only citizen,
and I would appreciate you so much
that I would never tax you,
and I would let you ride around town
in the fire truck, sirens on.
I would make sure the diner downtown
had a ham sandwich named after you,
and every weekend
there would be a parade in your honor,
and you would ride on the back
of an old DeSoto convertible and wave.
But the car would have to drive itself
because I would be marching alongside,
banging a big drum or showing off
on horseback while doing rope tricks
and playing the harmonica.
At dusk, I would play
the You Spangled Banner